Drinking in the Silence

February 9, 2015

Today was a unique day, but one that I will remember.

My older sister who lives with my dad and stepmom called last night to tell me that my dad is lonely during the day, and would it be possible for me to pick him up for the day. Get him out of the house to uplift his spirits, and give him interaction with others outside his home. I was more than happy to take him out for the day.

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Right now my dad is recovering from harsh cancer treatments. The affected area has made him lose his voice, strength, and all the other basic functions we take for granted. A lot of times he sits in silence observing the world around him. My dad is a talker, and thrives on interacting with others. The inability to talk, I’m sure, drives him nuts, and makes him lonely.

Once I picked him up from home, he made indications that he wanted to visit his friends at Burger King. My dad has been going to this Burger King every day for ten years or so. He knows everyone there, by name, and cares for them. After seeing their reaction to seeing him this morning, I can see they care for him as well. Their reactions to seeing him – well, I wish I would have recorded it. It was a tear jerker, for sure.

My dad has always emphasized the importance of building relationships with those that you meet. Even if it’s a casual get-to-know someone relationship, it’s important to him. No paying bills online. He goes into the local company store, and gets to know the people there. And he talks to every stranger he meets as though it’s not a stranger, but rather a friend he has yet to meet.

I saw that importance today.

I saw the meaning of the casual friendship.

I know it meant a lot to him to see them.

After leaving Burger King he gestured to take this turn, that turn, and so on until we ended up at the boat landing. We parked at the edge of the water, and watched, in silence, as the boats passed by under the bridge. The view was picturesque as though it was a painting. The water moved with each passing vessel, the clouds whisked the sky in gentle strands, and the trees bowed in submission to the wind. It’s the same boat landing I’ve been to since I was small, but this time would make me look at the familiar place with new eyes, and will always remember.

We sat in silence for about thirty minutes. I did a lot of thinking, as I’m sure my dad did as well. My youngest daughter, only four, also sat in silence observing the scene before her. We were mesmerized by God’s creation, and eagerly drank in the silence. It was over too soon.

The rest of the day was uneventful. I was glad to have my children home from school, and was relieved to have my husband home that evening. We watched television, laughed at our silly shows, and talked about nothing in particular.

Yes, my back still hurts, my stomach still has pressure, and my feet still throb with pain, but I’m okay. Life is good.

Disclaimer: Please understand that everyone is different in their journey with fibromyalgia and/or chronic illness. This is my journey, my stories, my vulnerability to share with you in order to help in some way. It is in no way to compare my journey with yours or to minimize your pains, feelings, or experiences. Please do not comment with any negativity.

Read more entries from My Fibro Journal.

Brandi

Hi, I’m Brandi, the writer and creator of Being Fibro Mom and My Fibro Journal. Aside from my work on Being Fibro Mom, I run a group called Fibro Parenting on Facebook. I've been writing for the Fibromyalgia Magazine since 2016 and recently became the Secretary and Fibro & Families program director for International Support Fibromyalgia Network. Facebook-+-Twitter-+-Instagram

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