This week’s review is The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k by Mark Manson. One of my favorite ways to rest is by curling up with a good book. Like movies and music, all genres appeal to me, and I give all books a chance to be ‘heard’!
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The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k by Mark Manson
I’ve never heard of Mark Manson. Or his shenanigans or even his star blog. (I still don’t know the name of it.) He’s just another stranger to me in this great big world. So, if that’s the case, then why did this book grab my attention the way it did? And I don’t mean his colorful language splashed across the front; although the title, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k, quickly grabbed my attention and the reason I picked it up in the first place.
What grabbed my attention was his straight forward attitude and no beating around the bush about the real stuff we need to hear about. The things we need to hear but don’t want to hear. About the little stuff that means big stuff. And about how we suck at things and that’s alright. We are who we are – even if it’s wrong a lot of the time (which is encouraged by Manson) – and how we should be constantly growing.
Some of my favorite parts of the book
Page 9: Embracing negativity. This is something I’ve started sharing on my own blog in the past few years. Depression and anxiety come with fibromyalgia and having lived with fibro since 2006, I can tell you that negativity isn’t something I can avoid. So instead of avoiding it, I started embracing it. I couldn’t tell you why this made sense to me, but Manson cleared that up: learning to deal with negativity is about problem-solving. And problem-solving is what life is all about seeing how we face it each and every day.
Page 13: “…learning how to focus and prioritize your thoughts effectively.” What I interpret this as is not wasting time on what doesn’t matter which will stress us out by worrying about it in the first place.
{I got swept up in the reading and forgot to take notes as I went. However, I know I’ll be reading this again in the future and can add notes here from these missing sections.}
Page 148: “Why use money as a way to measure my self-worth?” This raised so flags for me. I do measure my success/self-worth by how much money I bring home. Why? Because I equate the amount of money I bring home to how worthy I see myself. This doesn’t make sense when I asked myself that very question out loud. So I asked myself (again out loud): Is what I do valuable to me? Yes, it is. Ding ding ding!! Then why seek validation in monetary metrics? **shakes my head and face plants palm**
(continued thought on this page) Does money make me happy? No. Then what does make me happy? Being home with my kids. So my goals in life, what I truly want to do, is to be home with my kids. That is what I want to work towards. Who cares if I’m rolling in money (or more realistically, not rolling in it)?? As long as I can bring in enough to be home with them, that is good for me.
Page 154, second paragraph: “One must suffer emotional pain to develop greater emotional resilience, a stronger sense of self, increased compassion, and generally happier life.” Truth. This is not to say what caused the emotional pain was fair or okay, but rather when it happens, it builds us up to be stronger as we work through it. Again – embracing the negativity.
Page 207: “You are great. Already. Whether you realize it or not.” That’s essentially what this book is about in a nutshell.
My Conclusion
Hate to say it, but this IS a self-help book. It’s a stop and think about yourself and just how wrong you are. But that’s what’s so great about Manson’s book: It’s GOOD to be wrong…and suffer…and suck at life…and not give a fuck about stuff. It improves ourselves through growth and self-awareness to become better versions of ourselves while still being wrong, suffering, and giving fucks.
Manson’s points had me stopping, again and again, asking myself, “What am I doing this for – validation or for self?” “What value is there in this suffering?” “Do I really give a fuck about [insert here]?” I should mention: The whole book doesn’t contain a string of “fucks”. There is a lot in the first chapter but it tapers off as the book progresses.
It makes me have an inner dialogue and forces me to be honest – brutally honest – with myself about myself. Am I happy with what I see? No. Why? It’s ugly and not what I want to be. It’s not making me truly happy. How can I change it?
There is a lot of laugh out loud parts, but overall it’s a profound and self-realization book as Manson shares his view on life. And he doesn’t tell it from a point of view that has never had suffering or hasn’t lived life. He shares his suffering, his douchebag moments, and his world travels throughout the book.
Rather or not you think you have life figured out, give this book a read. I bet you will be rethinking a whole lot.
Book of the Month Club
I enjoyed books so much that I joined the Book of the Month Club to continue receiving the latest and greatest books via mail. Some of the books are exclusive to BOTM club members a month prior to their official publishing date! Each month I’m excited about the monthly selections, and it’s tough to select just one. (And when I can’t decide on one, I can add additional books for a small add-on charge and – as always – shipping is included in the monthly membership fee.) Can’t find one you want? That’s okay, too! Skip a month, pocket the credit to spend next month, and you won’t be charged for that current month.
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Book Ratings and Reviews
Each book I review is based on my opinion. My book rating is simple: love, like or dislike. I like the simplicity of it. This does not mean you will agree with the review or love/like/dislike the book, too. There’s a quote that says, “No two persons ever read the same book” by Edmund Wilson, and it’s quite true!
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